Rick Perry once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes slaughtering cows indiscriminately.
When Chuck Norris kills a ninja, he only takes its hide and some of the meat. When Rick Perry kills a ninja, he uses every part.
Rick Perry can blow bubbles with beef jerky.
“@rickperryfacts” in the Twittersphere offers those and hundreds of other fun "facts" on the Texas governor with the penchant for photo ops with firearms and other tough-man gear. The gag is a takeoff on the popular joke-a-sphere feature on Chuck Norris (and steals some of the Norris jokes verbatim). But I’ll have to say the tweeter — whoever he is, and it’s definitely a "he" — has done a decent job on the send-up.
So does the author work for rival Kay Bailey Hutchison's campaign or Perry's?
Other @rickperryfacts gems:
Rick Perry once breast-fed an injured flamingo back to health. And then boiled it alive.
Rick Perry built this city on rock and roll.
It’s the sort of gag that makes you want to join in. So here goes:
The roof of the new Cowboys stadium was made of Rick Perry’s hair.
Rick Perry ate Washington, D.C. and didn’t even have to burp.